Alt.sex.column

Emily Postfeminist

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Andrea is on vacation. Check out this column originally published Jan. 3, 2007.

Dear Andrea:

Recently, my boyfriend and I were at a strip club and bought a lap dance. My experience has been that, as a girl, the hands-off rule generally doesn't apply to me. However, out of respect for the girl, I don't touch until she invites me to. This one invited me to touch her. Read more »

A watched pot

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By Andrea Nemerson

andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I am gay and my boyfriend has trouble getting me off. I don't like anal sex much because receiving or giving it usually doesn't make me come. And my boyfriend usually can't get me off orally, either, which means I have to resort to my own hand sometimes. I bought a Fleshlight, which my boyfriend uses on me. I can come with the Fleshlight, but now I feel disconnected from my boyfriend.

Love,

Not Feeling It

Dear It:

No doubt. Read more »

Her cheatin' heart

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

Three years into my relationship with my girlfriend, I found her panties stuffed in her handbag and it turned me on. When I found out she had cheated on me and the panties were worn the night she cheated, I couldn't stop masturbating to them. We stayed together, went through counseling, and eventually got married. However, two months later, she was on a business trip and ended up sleeping with some guy she met at a bar. Read more »

New news, old year

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Readers:

It's been a crappy but interesting year in sex news, which, when you really think about it, could describe just about any year you care to look at. One of these stories is probably my favorite sex/science news ever, at least since we found out that female ejaculate comes from the bladder, not the tiny Skene's glands along the urethra. Read more »

Ball-busting jamboree

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

Some years ago I managed to stop a boy from going too far by grabbing hold of his testicles and squeezing them hard. It was totally justified, and he was disabled by the pain, allowing me to get away from him. The thing is, I squeezed that poor boy's balls much harder, and for far longer, than was necessary purely for self-defense. I now realize that I actually enjoyed inflicting that pain on him! It gave me a fantastic feeling of empowerment, hearing a big, muscular boy begging me to stop hurting him. Read more »

Nothing doing

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I've been married to my husband for close to 10 years. I admit, I didn't marry him because we were head over heels in love. I was only 21 when we met, but I already felt that being "in love" was a lie. It was something you saw in movies or read in romance novels — something silly that doesn't last. I did and do love my husband in my way, and he loves me. In the 10 years we've been together, I've seen many marriages fail. But we are still together and doing OK — at least, emotionally. Read more »

Extra! Extra! Heterosexuality in peril!

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Dear Readers:

I'm kind of pretty

and pretty damned smart

I like romantic things like music and art

and as you know I have a gigantic heart

so why ... Read more »

In every dream home ...

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I've been with my husband for 10 years, and we are still pretty young. He has become infatuated with a woman at work. It started as a ride-share and friendship, and recently developed (to their surprise) to an intense infatuation. He started staying out late nights drinking with the work crew so he could spend more time with her. They have not kissed or had sex, but the touchy-feeliness is there. After I discovered the relationship, he vowed to end it and to try to build stronger bonds with me. Read more »

Whiskey In The Jar

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

When my boyfriend has been drinking, sometimes he can't ejaculate. He says he can still come and all his other physical responses back this up. But he still has an erection after this happens. Read more »

Faking it

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I recently discovered that my husband of 15 years has secretly been participating in S-M activities. He has paid for the services of a dominatrix and has been meeting some dominant females on the Internet for whipping sessions. I am coping with the feelings of betrayal and have been getting counseling. I also have been reading up on the subject. Read more »