American Idol

American Idol, Steven Tyler in Drag edition

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This shit's getting so strange that you start to wonder if singing alone is enough to keep the Idol franchise going. In Oklahoma City, (thankfully) the last stop before the real action begins in Hollywood, Nicki Minaj is wearing weird leggings, Mariah Carey has some sort of diamond suit on, and Steven Tyler has a dress and a wig.Read more »

American Idol, Week One

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We make it through these early parts, Vivian and I -- the embarassing blooper reel is not the best part of a show that does, at times, actually discover talent -- and at times tosses it away. But this is where you get the first clips of someone who's going to be a household word in a few weeks, so we watch carefully.

Here's what we now know:Read more »

American Idol: This Country is Stupid Edition

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The voters are stupid. They elected George W. Bush (sort of) and now they've dissed the Best American Idol Perfomer Ever, wno also happens to be the only Korean to make it anywhere near this point in the show and (I think) the only Asian male.Read more »

American Idol: The Diddy and Hilfiger edition

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Two things:

1. You can't do a whole American Idol with a Billy Joel theme. He didn't write any good songs, and most of them are really bad. All it does it make the contestants look lame.

2. Diddy's not much of a song coach. Tommy Hilfiger, this week's celebrity fashion guru, has no idea how to dress performers for the show. Every suggestion they made was dumb. Every contestant who wore Hilfiger's picks looked horrible, out of place, ridiculous. Sell some jeans, Tommy.

Actually, three things:Read more »

American Idol: Warrant check edition

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Damn, I'm a day late here, sorry: All this fuss over the sheriff of San Francisco has taken me away from my sacred American Idol responsibilities. But Vivian has been on the case for me, and I caught most of the March 14 show and Viv watched March 15, so I've got the scoop, which goes like this:Read more »

American Idol: Whitney and Stevie edition

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The elimination round begins with the boys singing Stevie Wonder and the girls singing Whitney Houston. I think the boys got the worse end of it -- Whitney's a tough act to follow, particularly since she's dead, but Stevie Wonder songs were never meant to be sung by anyone but Stevie Wonder. Thing is, he's a great musician and singer, but a terrible lyricist, so when anyone else does his stuff it can easily sound stupid. Read more »

American Idol: Jeremy Lin and the women

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Our story so far:

The season has opened with a lot less weeping and drama than last year. The producers focused more on the winners than the losers, the `personal profiles weren't so bad and other than Steven Tyler diving naked (TMI) into a hotel pool and telling St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Joe Magrane that his 15-year-old daughter Shannon was "hot, humid, and happening" (just like Boston in the summer), it's all been relatively smooth.Read more »

American Idol: Whoa, Scotty!

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Before we finish off this season of surprises, I would like everyone to give it up for my stunning record of predictions -- I was wrong nearly every single week. And very wrong about the finale. I was sure poor Scotty was toast; not enough bubble-gum pop in his voice, not enough dancing, way too country. But whadya know -- Americans decided they'd pick the one with the actual talent.Read more »

American Idol: Mom, God and Lauren

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I think it's all over. Scotty did the best he could with three weak, uninteresting songs, proving that he'll have a fine career as a country singer once he's out from under the iron grip of the Idol contracts. But Lauren Alaina is poised to become the least talented singer ever to win American Idol, largely because she's got the votes of all those people who have nothing better to do than sit around for four hours after the show ends and send thousands of text votes on their phones.

Oh: and because of Mom.Read more »

American Idol: The weeping edition

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Six weeks ago, who could have imagined -- the American Idol final is Scotty and Lauren? Please. So many talented people gone, so little talent left ....

I like Scotty, I really do, despite the religion and the aw-shucks sheepishness. I think he's a sincere kid who will have a great career as a country music singer. But AI is supposed to showcase broad-based talent, and that's not him.Read more »